10 Signs that it’s My Birthday Week

Posted on by rachelewagner1
  1. A group of unenthusiastic minimum wage employees at Applebee’s are practicing my birthday song.
  2. My Amazon Wish List now features a hot pink motorized scooter and a new supply of Spanx.
  3. Everyone in my office is wearing pink and no polka dots (at my request).
  4. I’m using my lunch break to dust off my plastic tiara for work on Friday (yes, I do wear it all day).
  5. My husband has been selling blood to pay for all of my presents. Way to take one for the team!  Rachel’s birthday ain’t cheap baby.
  6. I’m smiling more than usual. My face hurts!
  7. My dogs stole my credit card to buy me gifts. Now they just need to figure out how to talk and use the computer.  Parker wants to buy me a ring from Tiffany’s.  Freddy and Reuben think I’d prefer a year’s supply of Omaha steaks.
  8. I’m eating Peeps for breakfast. A LOT of Peeps.
  9. Every spa coupon on Groupon and Living Social is now in my shopping cart. I think I deserve 12 massages, 8 facials, 24 mani/pedi’s and 10 body scrubs. My favorite button is “Add to Cart.”
  10. My boss offered to buy me a FitBit and I threatened to quit. She decided instead to give me her parking spot so I can take less steps for the rest of the year.  So sweet!

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