In preparation for the New Year I’m officially becoming a vegan (starting tomorrow)!  Like the commercial says, “new year, new you.”  When you really stop to think about it that commercial is offensive.  It’s like they’re saying there’s something wrong with the old you.  Like you were some kind of sub-human in 2015 and 2016 is finally your chance to be a real human.  I like the old me and I’m not sure I want to change it.  Can’t I just buy a bumper sticker that says “New Year, Same me”?  Anyway, I’m going to be a hard-core vegan this year.  Don’t even try to temp me with your crispy chicken wings or your juicy hamburgers or your Wawa Gobblers. No!  I cannot be broken.  Besides, I ate enough Gobblers in 2015 to get me through all of 2016 and possibly 2017.  I watched the movie Forks Over Knives and it has changed my whole perspective on animal products.  (Okay I watched it 2 years ago but it’s finally sinking in).  Every vegan I see on TV or in magazines always looks happy and thin and glowing.  I’m already happy but now I want to be thin and glowing.  Why can’t I glow?  Look, if I have to become that annoying person who loses all of her friends because she’s too beautiful and glowing all the time, I’m okay with that.  Too many people like me anyway.  It’s getting ridiculous.  It’s at the point where I can’t even go to the mailbox without my neighbor saying hello.  Like I’m some kind of celebrity.  In 2016 I’m happy to just sit at home alone with my dogs, bathing in my living room soaking tub and glowing to my heart’s content.

And P.S: Frito’s are vegan…I checked.